Relationship is an important factor in life and human beings are very prone to “make up and break up” situation which happens several times. Human relations are established with various factors and it depends on us how we keep those relations intact. There are also situations where we are influenced by others and we consider them as our ideal. Looking at the other way, one can also be an ideal for others, can influence and have a good convincing power. There are many work, research and books written on human behaviour and human relations, this article picks one of them. The book titled “How to Win Friends and Influence People”, written by Dale Carnegie is a must read for everyone as it makes us understand several practical life facing situation with ample examples.
About the Author
Dale Carnegie was an American writer and lecturer. Born on 24th November 1888 in Missouri in United States, his work is considered to be the finest in terms of human relations, inter personal skills, public speaking and self-improvement. He was a famous writer of his time and his work is still remembered today.
Carnegie’s first collection of his writings was Public Speaking: a Practical Course for Business Men (1926), later entitled Public Speaking and Influencing Men in Business (1932). In 1936, he wrote How to Win Friends and Influence People which became a bestseller from its debut. By the time of his death on 1st November 1955, the book had sold five million copies in 31 languages. He wrote several other books including:
- The Art of Public Speaking
- The Leader in You
- How to Stop Worrying and Start Living
- How to Enjoy Your Life and Your Job etc.
The book title of Dale Carnegie says all about the content and is indeed impressive and draws attention and so does the material inside the book.
About 15 percent of one’s financial success is due to one’s technical knowledge and about 85 percent is due to skill in human engineering- to personality and the ability to lead people.
– Dale Carnegie
Dale Carnegie books had many things to offer for book lovers. All his books contain many examples which provides a broad view of the perspective. It will not be injustice to say that his books provide a practical way to look at the situations in life. The best part of his writing was, he used to provide examples followed by establishing the principles.
About the Book
How to Win Friends and Influence People is his best-selling book. Published in 1936, till today this book is read by many across the globe as it provides basic etiquette that one should posses in his life. The book deals with the fundamental techniques in handling people, six ways to make people like you, how to win people to your way of thinking and how to change people without giving offense or arousing resentment. Each of the afore-mentioned topics are dealt in separate part of the book.
In the words of Dale Carnegie, “Dealing with people is probably the biggest problem you face, especially if you are in business”. The same is applicable in day to day life as People’s Management plays a vital role in life.
In life, we often come to situation we are criticized by others and we do criticize others. The book starts with the fundamental techniques in handling people and guess what is the first fundamental principle? It is indeed criticism. It says not to criticize, condemn or complain. In fact, Dale Carnegie states that ‘Criticism is a self-defence tool.” The chapter on criticism is worth to read and understand.
Any fool can criticize, condemn and complain- and most fools do.
– Dale Carnegie
This book is best known for providing Six ways to Make People Like You which are as follows:
- Become genuinely interested in other people.
- Remember that a person’s name is to that person the sweetest and most important sound in any language.
- Be a good listener. Encourage others to talk about themselves.
- Talk in terms of the other person’s interest.
- Make the other person feel important – and do it sincerely.
The entire book is full of powerful and motivational statements. It gives you a sense of self-love as well apart from motivation. While reading the book, one can feel the power of words and get the essence of some worth literary pieces. The entire book is motivational and contains worth reading material. I have picked some of the quotes which is worth reading and hence thought sharing the same which includes:
- In our interpersonal relations we should never forget that all our associates are human beings and hunger for appreciation. It is the legal tender that all souls enjoy.
- First, arouse in the other person an eager want. He who can do this has the whole world with him. He who cannot walks a lonely way.
- The desire for a feeling of importance is one of the chief distinguishing differences between mankind and animals.
- If there is any one secret of success, said Henry Ford, it lies in the ability to get the other person’s point of view and see things from that person’s angle as well as from your own.
- The world is full of people who are grabbing and self-seeking. So the rare “individual who unselfishly tries to serve others has an enormous advantage. He has little competition.
- We are interested in others when they are interested in us.
- People who talk only of themselves think only for themselves. And those people who think only of themselves are hopelessly uneducated. They are not educated, no matter how instructed they may be.
- If you argue and rankle and contradict, you may achieve a victory sometimes; but it will be an empty victory because you will never get your opponent’s goodwill.
- Buddha said: “Hatred is never ended by hatred but by love, and a misunderstanding is never ended by an argument but by tact, diplomacy, conciliation and a sympathetic desire to see the other person’s viewpoint.
There are many other quotes which are impressive and worth to read but it is not possible to mention all. Read the book as it is a good material for developing interpersonal skills and self improvement which in turn helps in personality development. Many people might have already gone through this book and those who haven’t please read it as it is readily available in almost every book stall and can be purchased online as well. I will be coming up with more stuffs on books soon.
Stay tuned… Stay happy and keep visiting… 🙂 🙂
– Ashish Kumar